Tag Archives: family

Parenting

I have been wanting to post something about this issue for years, but found others to talk about. However, the time has come that I MUST do it NOW! Thanks to my good friend and Marine brother, a retired Sergeant Major of Marines, who sent this to me this morning.  I enjoyed it and agreed with it so much that I had to read it twice. This guy has nailed it squarely on the head. 

COMMENTARY- The Blade, Toledo, OH

Parents, not guns, are responsible for keeping kids safe

 

BY MATT MARKEY BLADE OUTDOORS EDITOR

There were 361,119 hunters in Ohio in the most recent season. Michigan had 665,431 hunters. They carried shotguns, rifles, pistols, and lethal archery equipment, so they were armed to the hilt. But no one shot anyone else.

That’s more than one million individuals with firearms, but they didn’t settle a neighborhood squabble, a fight over a girlfriend, a dispute involving territory, a road rage incident, a case of perceived disrespect, or an instance of just looking at someone the wrong way, with violence.

They did not allow their guns, which most own for hunting and personal protection, to become weapons used to settle some petty discord, the result of which we see on the streets of our major cities on a frighteningly regular basis.

In that scenario, which seems to be playing out on an endless loop, lives end — too often those of innocent bystanders — families are devastated, mothers are left to mourn, the perpetrators end up in the prison system, and we pay to support them for decades.

And many of our politicians, community leaders, and sociologists hit the well-worn but ever-reliable default button of blame — Gun Violence. They are infatuated with that term. Make the lifeless device culpable. Focus your condemnation on a piece of steel. Claim that the inanimate object is the actual source of the evil.

There were more than 3,000 youths at the 2022 high school Target Shooting National Championship competition. Every one of them had a powerful shotgun, but nobody shot anyone. There will be more than 4,000 people taking part in the National Matches at Camp Perry this summer, firing rifles and pistols, but as has been the case for more than 100 years, nobody will shoot anyone, despite the abundance of firepower and ammunition on site.

Then we hear about a six-year-old in Virginia taking a handgun to school and shooting his teacher. The national news calls it Gun Violence, but nobody demands to know where he got the gun, where did he learn to use it, and where are his parents.

Two teens arrested after a recent brawl at a Columbus mall were found to be carrying fully-loaded handguns. In a Cleveland suburb, two boys, ages 12 and 13, were charged with aggravated murder for shooting down a 14-year-old schoolmate. The cases keep rolling in, and we lump them all into that convenient Gun Violence folder.

Much closer to home, the examples are equally abundant.

A 16-year-old is arrested for shooting and killing another teen near the playground area at Ravine Park Village apartment complex in East Toledo. A convenience store on Phillips Avenue is robbed by two gun-toting teens, and one of them dies in a shootout with police.

In January, a 15-year-old girl is found shot to death in a North Toledo alley. Three teens decide to shoot up a funeral in Toledo and two funeral home employees are wounded. A 15-year-old boy is killed and a 10-year-old seriously wounded during a Wednesday night shooting at Avondale and Brown avenues.

Other teens are injured in shootings at two in the morning where the gunslinger is also a juvenile. We have a news conference, bringing out the long faces and the somber tone, but nobody in authority asks mom and dad what their children are doing out at that hour. Nobody asks where they got the guns.

Instead, we make Gun Violence the boogeyman. We describe it as if it is the next coronavirus variant or an invasive species that just arrived from a foreign land. No one dares demand some personal responsibility from the parents of the youths involved in these shootings and other crimes.

We hear about these “violence interrupters” who are going to ride into town, work the streets, and put an end to kids killing other kids. That approach turned out to be a band aid that didn’t stick when applied over a metastasized gargantuan tumor, and a colossal waste of time, and money.

Still searching for a magic potion, we find a program from Kentucky. This is going to fix our Gun Violence problem. More programs, more government money, more meetings. But nobody wants to talk about parenting or your responsibility for the children you bring into this world.

When a juvenile believes that picking up a gun, pointing it at another human being, and pulling the trigger is the way to solve their problems or take what they want, we’ll have to go a lot further than Kentucky or Chicago — maybe to Heaven above — to find the solution. Because nobody wants to dare mention the source of the issue.

Kids learn a lot at home — both good and bad — and if home shirks this responsibility, then there are plenty of nefarious outside sources ready to fill the gap. And when kids see that irresponsible behavior is acceptable, as well as a lack of concern and culpability for their actions, they often take these same traits into a troubled adult life.

Like many kids, I found that my father was a very effective violence interrupter. You treated your neighbors, teachers, women, law enforcement, and your friends with respect because, from the earliest age, that is the way you saw your role model treating other people. And you did not want to transgress and end up in Dad’s court.

While searching for an appropriate and acceptable description for the kind of leadership we need at this critical juncture, when kids killing other kids has become so common, this came up — a comment from a Toledo police officer following yet another slaying involving our children.

“We need parents involved in kids’ lives. We need structure. We need routine. We need discipline. We need rules and boundaries,” this female officer said.

That should have been the mic drop moment that ended this circus of news conferences and proclamations and addressing this issue with wads of money and more bureaucratic folderol.

She nailed it, but I don’t think that perspective has been raised by anyone in authority ever since.

Contact Blade outdoors editor Matt Markey at: mmarkey@theblade.com or 419-724-6068.

My question has always been who is responsible when when a 10 or 12-year-old takes a gun from home to school and kills someone? No one wants to place the blame where it should be. instead we feel sorry for the parents, Oh my it’s so sad that my 10 year-old Johnny shot and killed his best friend over an argument. R U shitting me? Furthermore, the parents cannot believe that their son did something so horrific. It’s those damn slack guns laws. Really?

I know I will be criticized by some as being crazy or out of touch with reality, but I believe we should lock both parents up for ten years. Put that kid in a juvenile home and get his ass straightened out once and for all. It is time we start looking at who is actually responsible for a 10 year-old killing another kid.  Nuff said, and bring it on liberals!

 

Observations

Hi Folks, it’s ole Jim here; finally home. My bride and I just returned home from a seven week, 4,559 mile trip in the RV to visit children, grandchildren and great grandchildren. The trip took us through sixteen States: FL, GA, TN, KY, MO, KS, IA, IL, IN, OH, WV, PA, MD, VA, NC, and SC. Such a trip through so many states has left me with several observations of  our country and its citizens, or let me just say our society at large, and I thought it may be interesting to some of my readers to share some of my observations.

First, our roadways suck. With only one exception the Interstates are in such horrible shape it is dangerous to drive on them. That exception is OH; theirs are literally wonderful to drive on; I did not have to dodge one pothole on the entire East/West length of I-80, while on some of the other state’s major roadways the potholes were so big and deep one could easily blow a tire or break an axle. What those states are doing with their fuel tax revenue and federal funding has to be secret.

Secondly, I have traveled a lot throughout the country for many years and I have never seen so much truck traffic. Goods are definitely on the move. There were times where I could look across to the other lane and see nothing but a sea of semis, one behind the other for miles; hundreds of them in both lanes. Perhaps that’s why the Interstates are in such bad shape, but then why not OH since I-80 was the first time I noticed the plethora of trucks.

Thirdly, I refuse to accept anyone, and I do mean ANYONE, bitching about the price of gas. Everybody is complaining that gas is too expensive. Well, if they think it is, why not slow down and try to get the best miles per gallon as you can? On Interstates, I drive 60 MPH in the right lane, even though the speed limit is 65/70. Why? Well I am driving a 26,000 LB vehicle while towing my 2,500 LB Mini Cooper behind me. My 6.7 L Cummins engine’s sweet spot seems to be 1600 RPMs (60 MPH), which gave me 11.4 MPG. Plus, I don’t have to look at both mirrors, except of course when passing a merge lane where those folks who got their license at Walmart’s do not know what that upside down red triangle “YIELD” sign means. I am only doing 60 and the speed limit is 70, yet they cannot step on the gas to get into the flow of traffic. Since I’m bigger I simply ignore them and their blaring horns and watch them run onto the shoulder. I know I will catch hell from some for saying this, but trust me folks, more often than not they are young women.

My travels were probably about 50/50 on Interstates and state/county roadways. I can honestly state that I did not pass a dozen vehicles during this entire trip. That includes non-Interstate roadways. I DO NOT SPEED! If the speed limit is 55, I drive 55 and I do not care if a line of idiots begin to form behind me. I refuse to pull over and stop 28,500 LBS so they can speed while bitching about the price of gas. Think about it. If you are on a 200 mile trip and you drive 60 MPH, you should get there in about two hours. If you drive 55 MPH, it will take you ten minutes longer, and will probably save a gallon or two of gas. I am in no hurry, if I were in an emergency situation such as taking my wife to the ER, I would have my “emergency” flashers on and I would push the speed limit as long as it was safe. Otherwise, I obey the speed limit. In my home state of FL, I am the only one who drives the speed limit and believe me I do catch hell for it from blaring horns and obscene gestures from the idiots. How dare I drive the speed limit! We have the worse drivers in America because they all came from up north.

I’m an observant driver and you want to hear something funny? I noticed so many people driving 20 miles over the speed limit with their windows down in 95 degree temperatures. I guess they think they are saving gas by not running their AC. LOL

Fourth, drivers of all makes, models, genders, ages, race, ethnicity, religion, etc. are horrible, ignorant, inconsiderate drivers who must get in front of the one in front of them no matter the costs. They drive as though they own the roadway and could care less about anyone else. I mean it is horrible out there folks. I literally had folks pass me, pull right in front of me, and hit the damn brakes to merge off an exit. The only ones who have any patience and are considerate are the truck drivers. The majority of them are still polite, and like me, are wary of all four wheelers. I would not take a long trip in a car. I feel safe driving our RV as I am sitting up at the height of the truck drivers so I see far out in front of me thus allowing me to anticipate what the idiots in front of me are about to do. And I don’t tailgate; I can’t since everyone is going faster than me. LOL I’ve never seen so many horrible accidents on the Interstates, which of course caused us numerous delays while they policed up the body parts. I often doubted if anyone made it out of the multiple car carnage alive.

Fifth. Construction is going on everywhere. Building, building, and building in every county, town, and city. Massive buildings, condos, homes, factories, shopping centers are going up everywhere. I have never see so much construction, and my home state of FL is one of the busiest!

Sixth. At every turn all we saw were “Help Wanted,” Hiring,” “Need Help” signs on store fronts, fast food places, factories, etc. Every proprietor and owner is looking for employees. Every semi-trailer has a “Drivers Wanted” sign on the back offering all sorts of benefits and wages. Many even offering to train free of charge to get their CDL license. I mean, damn, why is the unemployment rate so high when everyone is looking for employees? LOL, Of course we all know the answer to that question.

One more thing. We Floridians know which license plate adorns the cars with America’s worst drivers – NJ. Those folks could care less about anyone else! They all got their license’s at Walmart or maybe Wendy’s because they do not know how to drive. Oh, they might know, but could care less about you and me.

Anyway, I thought I’d share with you some thoughts of having travelled through so many States. Personally, the one thing that bothered me more than anything is the state of our society—it sucks. People simply do not seem to care about anything or anyone except perhaps their own close family. Oh there are exceptions, and I consider myself one of them. Despite everyone else’s arrogance and ignorance, some of us continue to be considerate and polite toward other drivers Thank God we made it home safe and sound!

It’s great to be home! I will never do this again. If kin want to see my bride and me, let them come to FL.