New Movie

Title Only-crop (2)Great news! Watch for the new movie at your local theater called We’ll All Die As Marines starring  _________  (you fill in the blank)

My book was published by IUniverse, which is a POD Publisher (Print On Demand). In other words, I paid them to print my book, and I will say they did a magnificent job. I love the cover, which they designed once I provided them with the photos, verbiage, etc. They even designed the website, business cards, book markers, and postcards — by the way, none of this was cheap. Once all that was done they do nothing but sell the book at what I consider an exorbitant price, but I have no say in that whatsoever, it is all based on the number of pages.

I believe they actually make their money on selling programs not books. I have bought into some of their many marketing programs at several thousand dollars each, which did nothing but put me deeper into the red. While some appeared to have promise of getting the book in front of a quasi-military audience, I cannot attribute one sale to any of the programs I purchased.

I was constantly hounded, and yes, I considered it “hounded” and unprofessional to continually call me to buy a program to market the book so they could sell more and receive 80% of the net profit on each sale.

Then came the final shot — they tipped the scales with this one. They wanted me to have a screen writer do an outline, which they would send to an entertainment company. If the company liked it, I would then allow the screen writer to actually develop a movie script. Sounds wonderful right? What author would not want to see his book title on a theater marque, or on a DVD at Blockbuster’s, or on Netflix? There is one small catch; however, this entire program was to cost me slightly over $20,000.00. And even then, there was no guarantee that it would be picked up by a production company. Needless to say, I damned near fell out of my chair laughing at the poor gal that had to make that call.

First of all, the book is not the type that would produce a movie script. Had she read it, or even scanned it before making the call? Hell, had anyone at the company even peeked at the book to see if it had the right kind of story? I think not.

Therefore, once I regained my composure, I politely told the young woman that I thought I’d pass. I told her I wouldn’t do it because they might get Cruise, Clooney, or worse yet Penn to play me. I could handle Mark Wahlberg, Gary Sinise, or John Travolta — I like their passion. She actually thought I was serious and told me I would have “rights” in the production. This was so hilarious — it was beyond belief, and it ended my relationship with the publisher, except for ordering books from them.

So, I am sorry to say, there will be no movie entitled We’ll All Die As Marines. LOL

Semper Fi, Jim

9 thoughts on “New Movie”

  1. Well, truth be told, I’m thinking Charles Bronson for you as “Bomburst”, that Marlboro Man for Hopper, I’m sticking with Swarzenegger to try to fill my shoes, Wally Cox for your best pal Wellman on CG-11, and if you insist, Danny DeVito for Andersen (playing against type of course), Steven Hawking for Lt. Commander McNeil.

    1. Wow, I think you covered them all Doug, and I like your recommendations. Wait a minute, there is one we cannot leave out W.W. aka “Wa Wa” Jordon, the XO. We gotta come up with someone that is not funny, zero leadership, arrogant, mean-spirited, lacking any personality whatsoever, and a complete ass.

    2. Jim, in response to who might play XO Jordan, I suggest Alan Rickman, the guy who played “Professor Snape” in the Harry Potter movies. He could do justice to a sniveling, obsequious, ass-kissing, no nothing, so and so as you so well have already described him. BTW, Gary once called him a “Pussy Belly”, which for your edification, apparently is someone who has the weird kind of belly that balloons out below the belt, rather than above it.

      How’s that for finalizing the cast?

      Doug

  2. Col Jim
    They could never duplicate the Parade Sequence …… Let alone write a decent screenplay …… Sell sell sell ……Marine.
    I am a slow reader but love it so far – Just finished the Drill Team Section – we in the D & B got our asses chewed a few times by Paul G – quite the pompous CO – I won’t call him a leader.

    Semper Fi ! Sir

    1. Bill, while I usually refrain from speaking ill of the departed, in his case, I shall make an exception. Leader is the last thing I would ever think of calling him. And, we have lots of company, including his XO at the time.

  3. Hey, Jim, put me in for a buck! Maybe you can get Danny DeVito to play the lead. I was thinking a young Swartzenegger to play my part. Clooney for Ltjg. Andersen of course.

    Keep me posted.

    Doug

Please leave a comment on this post or on any subject; all are appreciated. Thank you and Semper Fi, Jim